It’s Novel

This was/is to be the cover of a novel I started writing 1 1/2 years ago. I posed for it, even though it’s fictional and not about me.

Then life brought me to a bumpy road shortly after, and I put my book away, where it sits on my hard drive. I intended it to be an erotic novella, but I think it wants to be something else. Erotic, but not a novella. It’s hard to keep the rise and fall of sexual tension going throughout an entire book. Yeah, even in my head.

Erotica lives in my head constantly. Actually, turns out it’s not that weird, only taboo. I’ve always been fascinated by things that aren’t as they seem, people and places that hide an entire underground existence, secret from the unenlightened.

Philosophy is like that, as is music, and science. And certainly sexuality.

I happen to be the personality type represented by less than 1% of the human population (I accept my oddness). I met a woman today who teaches erotic sexuality, and besides being awestruck by the fact that someone actually does that, she has the same personality type as me ~ so immediately she’s a kindred spirit.

Which brings me to my point ~ that I need to stop living in the normal world and wave my freak flag. And keep writing.

PS…I swear,  this is a line I just read in “The Winter Over”

At some point, potential had to be realized, or you simply ended where you began: a blank, empty, meaningless frame of white, waiting for effort to give it meaning.

Iden, Matthew (2017-02-01). The Winter Over (p. 58). Thomas & Mercer. Kindle Edition.

8 thoughts on “It’s Novel

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  1. You are right on the distinction between eroticism and porn. It’s actually obvious when I think about, it is not the degree of “volume” (there is soft porn and hard core eroticism, I guess) but more on the intent. Anyway, this is exciting read and stimulating to think. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

    It would indeed be interesting to read what is in your hard drive. Perhaps you could either share it privately with me (via email) or publish excerpts of it on your blog?


  2. “Erotic” is an adjective that doesn’t describe most porn. Eroticism, I believe, exists in the intellect, and doesn’t even necessarily have to do with sex, but it leads to the desire of it.

    Eroticism is something hard to find and hard to create. It’s tension and release.

    I have a friend who seems a pretty normal, almost under-the-radar kind of person. But she teaches couples how to be erotic, how to push the envelope with each other, how to explore things (sexually and mentally) in a safe “place.” Which I think is very cool. Of course, it’s not for everyone, but it’s for those who see sexuality as another dimension to explore.

    There’s so much I could write about in response to your comment, but that’s the basic concept as I see it.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I haven’t read the Shades either, and for the very same reasons don’t intend either. Another interesting question is what the difference between erotic and porn is. Or is there? And if so, what is it that we want, you and I? I would be inclined to say porn, for the very reason that “erotic” sounds so veiled, almost petty bourgeois. Porn has a certain chime of dignity or truth in it, cutting straight down to the animal in us… in a positive sense. However, I think almost all visual porn that I have seen is really dull and unimaginative. So what I crave for is intelligent, high quality, thought and sense provoking, arousing porn true to our animal instincts. Visual and literary. I think this could really be your calling. As a species our most unique characteristic is big brain and limitless imagination!


  4. It’s true, there is little really good erotic literature, and even less truly erotic porn. Believe me, I’ve tried to find it. Maybe I need to seriously think of contributing to the literary need. Like my blog, I started that book just for the hell of it. And it is surprising at the lack of quality out there. Maybe few people really understand the meaning of “erotic.”

    I’ve never read the “50 Shades” books, and don’t intend to. I understand from many people I respect in the literary world that the writing is terrible ~ the popularity of the books promotes bad writing.

    I can do better, can’t I?

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hey, I’ve done that a while ago, but I haven’t got a faintest memory about the result! I think I have a problem with these tests, I just can’t take them seriously, although they do sometimes yield useful insight about oneself. I have to look into this, if and when I have time.

    But about erotic novellas etc, I find it a bit weird how little there is of that sort in the world, good stuff I mean. Just thinking about the vasts stock or porn in the internet, of all flavours, it is amazing how little good fiction there is. The sort, as you said, that would capture your imagination, keep you hooked, and aroused for a long time. I should think we as a species would find such stuff really exciting and it would be in high demand. But it should be something as sensual and as passionate as your blog… and feel like black leather…:-)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. You keep amazing me day after day! 🙂 That novel sounds exciting, and if you would like me to read it and comment, even as draft, I would be delighted.

    What is the personality type you are referring to and how can one test such a thing?


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